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*TRIGGER WARNING THIS EPISODE DISCUSSES INFANT LOSS*
Meet Tiffany Orellana
Journey of healing after infant loss.
When baby Jasmine was born Tiffany and her husband had completed their blended family. Only 19 days after little Jasmine was born tragedy struck while Tiffany was at her husband’s bedside after a knee surgery. Their lives took a drastic change for the second time in under a month.
This episode is with one of my clients from the Busy To Bomb Fit Mom program who courageously agreed to come on and discuss her healing journey after losing her 19 day old daughter to SIDS.
In This Podcast
- There’s no going back
- Leaning on the ones you love most
- Do things with intention
There’s no going back
A new baby is such a joyful time for a family. And, as moms we know that feeling when our family is complete. Your family’s little caboose. But sometimes things don’t work out the way you plan and SIDS ends your babies life long before anyone ever expected and your whole world stops. Where do you go from here? How do you explain it to your other children? And, telling anyone other than immediate family feels like you stop breathing every time you have to relive it.
Then the “I should have been there, I could have stopped it” starts to come into play. But there’s nothing anyone can do about SIDS. Nobody sees it coming, nobody can stop it. That beautiful child has fulfilled its purpose in life very quickly. And, It was your beautiful gift to remember forever and to bring those you’re meant to be close to even closer. To heal together in the name of that child.
Leaning on the ones you love most
After the tragic and untimely loss of her daughter, Tiffany found there wasn’t much support for parents who suffer this type of loss. A counselor from the county and a support group she could go to. But She didn’t want to sit with other parents who had also lost their children and hear more sadness and about more loss. Tiffany wanted to know there was joy after this. That life does go on and that she can in fact be happy again. She found solace in her other children and her husband who was her rock during their difficult time. She knew she couldn’t get that from a group.
Slowly she began her journey of healing. Smiling at a memory of her baby, a laugh at something funny he kids did. Then realizing the best way to honor her daughter was to live in her memory.
Do things with intention
“No more going through the motions”
The first year is HARD! Every holiday remembering your baby and wanting so badly for them to be there with you. But stop and realize you still have other family members that love and need you, you need each other. That doesn’t mean not to mourn. Mourn, get it out, remember them. But know that they are there with you. Look for little signs of them and when something reminds you of them, in that moment, they are with you. Find an escape. Something you do for yourself to release any tension and allow light back in. You can read, join a workout group, take long walks and talk to your baby, don’t feel guilty for that alone time. And, when that light starts to come back into your life, your baby will be there in spirit. Give your baby the glory for everything good that happens and remember them in a positive way.
Talk to and about your baby as often as you need or want to. Keep their beautiful memory alive. Find the collateral beauty that came from this and know there will be joy again.
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Meet Melissa Vogel
Melissa Vogel is an energetic keynote speaker, business owner, certified personal trainer, certified group fitness instructor, 1st degree Black Belt in Tae Kwon Do, a mother of three, and a podcaster.
Melissa was voted Best Personal Trainer for 2020 by Inland Empire Magazine, and built the Busy to Bomb Fit Mom exercise system.
She is quickly becoming recognized for her expertise and influence in her field!
Melissa has also contributed to numerous publications and has been featured in the Trail Blazer Magazine, and published in the April 2020 edition of Health Magazine. Her approach incorporates personal experience, energy, humor, and charisma.
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